tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6824896765631412903.post8411962545661730944..comments2023-09-05T12:51:25.656-05:00Comments on edittorrent: PatienceEdittorrenthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14295505709568570553noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6824896765631412903.post-63526328932220720832009-06-22T11:19:33.491-05:002009-06-22T11:19:33.491-05:00Thank you so much for taking my piece! I've be...Thank you so much for taking my piece! I've been away and came home to see this. <br /><br />Yes, she is running for the sake of running, and the next line is:<br /><br /><i>For the sheer ecstasy of feeling every muscle reaching its absolute capacity. </i><br /><br />and later:<br /><br /><i>Chasing what? The illusion of some prey? Just chasing, that was for sure, not being chased. <br /></i>Run.<i> <br />For the running was the joy. No fear. Just symmetry of perfect athleticism and grace and rhythm. <br /></i><br /><br />Farm fields will go from a field of wheat to a field of corn in juxtaposition, no fences - the patchwork look you see from a plane. Does this work?<br /><br /><i>She made a path through the wheat, which felt like fairy whips beating, "faster, faster, go faster" and when the corn field started she disappeared into the rows, the running lanes, cool and dark. </i><br /><br />Thank you for your insight on the perspective. I think I want it both ways. I'd like the reader to feel like he or she is watching an from above. From an invisible helicopter through a zoom lens. But I also would like the reader to feel the dog's (and yes it is a dog) exhilaration as she runs. Is that impossible?<br /><br />Thank you again-<br />PatiencePatience-pleasehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13262203054740351060noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6824896765631412903.post-20377155987408875952009-06-17T11:38:02.250-05:002009-06-17T11:38:02.250-05:00I love being a novice, I learn something new whene...I love being a novice, I learn something new whenever I visit here. Better still, I understand it ;)Glynis Peters https://www.blogger.com/profile/01175378917872403609noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6824896765631412903.post-27529335742382445332009-06-17T05:05:45.283-05:002009-06-17T05:05:45.283-05:00Fabulous way to show point of view/perspective wit...Fabulous way to show point of view/perspective with the "zoom OUT"!Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14565683058021299230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6824896765631412903.post-78204910570267523472009-06-16T13:22:30.267-05:002009-06-16T13:22:30.267-05:00Well, the hard part is fixing. Sometimes something...Well, the hard part is fixing. Sometimes something just doesn't feel right, but achieving rightness isn't so easy. :)<br />AliciaEdittorrenthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14295505709568570553noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6824896765631412903.post-26182322106406637342009-06-16T13:14:11.392-05:002009-06-16T13:14:11.392-05:00Wow, what an amazing job of editing! You noticed t...Wow, what an amazing job of editing! You noticed things that I never would have in my initial reading and in your analysis, you've pointed out things I can look for in my own writing. Thank you.suzanneelizabeths.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14304462740451230118noreply@blogger.com